Ladies, Which of These Would You Fall For? - Simply SAMAD

Simply SAMAD

A blog dedicated to short stories from Nigeria and exciting tales all over the world


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Thursday, March 06, 2014

Ladies, Which of These Would You Fall For?

1. Do you mind if I hang out here until it's safe back where I farted?

2. Are you an interior decorator? 'Cause when I saw you, the entire room became beautiful.

3. Are you religious? 'Cause you're the answer to all my prayers.
4. Do you have a Band Aid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.

5. They say dating is a numbers game... so can I get your number?

6. Do you have a sunburn, or are you always this hot?

7. If I were a stop light, I'd turn red every time you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer.

8. You know I'd like to invite you over, but I'm afraid you're so hot that you'll skyrocket my air-conditioning bill.

9. My buddies bet me that I wouldn't be able to start a conversation with the most beautiful girl in the bar. Wanna buy some drinks with their money?

10. I wanna live in your socks so I can be with you every step of the way.

11. You'd better direct that beauty somewhere else, you'll set the carpet on fire.

12. If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

Hey baby, you must be a light switch, because every time I see you, you turn me on!

13. For a moment I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Now I see that I am very much alive, and heaven has been brought to me.

14. Sorry, but you owe me a drink. [Why?] Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine.

15. Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you've got fine written all over you.

16. You look cold. Want to use me as a blanket?

17. Can I have directions? [To where?] To your heart.

18. I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by YOU.

19. I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I'm going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.

20. Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material.

21. Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes.

22. Babe, your beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of the moon.

23. Fascinating. I've been looking at your eyes all night long, 'cause I've never seen such dark eyes with so much light in them.

24. I'm not a photographer, but I can picture me and you together.

25. You're so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line.

26. You shouldn't wear makeup. It's messing with perfection!

27. If I had a star for every time you brightened my day, I'd have a galaxy in my hand.

28. Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Cause you have a pretty sweet ass.

29. I don't have a library card, but do you mind if I check you out?

30. Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!

31. When I'm older, I'll look back at all of my crowning memories, and I'll think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the day that I met you.

32. If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.

33. How about you wrap your legs around my head so I can wear you like the crown you are?

34. You smell like trash, may I take you out?

35. I'll be Burger King and you be McDonald's. I'll have it my way, and you'll be lovin' it.

36. I don't have a girlfriend, but I do know a woman who would be mad at me for saying that.

37. Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

38. I don't know if you know this, but you look a lot like my next girlfriend.

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